Chucks Pads Disposable Adult Underpads [100-Pack] 30"x36" XXL Extra-Large Super-Absorbent Incontinence Bed Pads – Mattress Protector Pee Pads for Adults, Kids & Pets – Bed Protection & Training

“In sickness and health” doesn’t mean, “Can neglect personal hygiene.” Of course people get weak when ill, but his outright refusals to take preventative measures to minimize his mess or perform any immediate cleaning of himself and/or the bed is just plain rude. With you doing it for him, you’re enabling his avoidant behavior. Until he literally gets his shit together, the onus is on him to vacate the bed and sleep elsewhere. If he is stubborn and refuses, you may need to relocate to save your sanity and health (waking up all night is not healthy). It may also help to scare him by showing him an online image search for -pressure ulcers -pressure sores -moisture associated dermatitis in adults Another option might be to call them “disposable briefs” to help preserve his dignity. Of course, it’s not recommended to wear them while sleeping because the combination of heat, moisture, feces, and pressure on the skin will cause those wounds mentioned above. While sleeping, I’d recommend disposable chucks you can purchase to line the bed for sleeping (and save the disposable briefs for when out of bed, because it’s just a matter of time until his incontinence extends to waking hours), and keep some wet wipes and barrier cream/ointment on the coffee table (or bedside table) before going to bed https://a.co/d/034znUXV